The Job

It has been almost five years since I started working at LDS Family Services, my dream job (I had written in my journal my senior year of high school that my "dream job" was to work for LDS Family Services). Even after five years, I can still say that it is my dream job. I want to be there for a long time-- time will tell if that is going to happen, but we will see. I don't share a lot on this blog about my job, for obvious reasons, the largest of which is client confidentiality. But, my job is a really big part of my life and I want to remember a few things (with sparse details recorded here) that have made it exciting lately.

Our whole staff meets every Wednesday for a weekly meeting and it is really quite comical how often we say, "Just when we think we have seen it all..." and then someone proceeds to tell the newest crazy, never-thought-we'd-deal-with-this story. Some truly unbelievably things have happened in my time there. We often joke that we need our own reality T.V. show too, to keep track of all the craziness. :)

However, the biggest reason I love my job is because I get to be a part of miracles all the time. I am so blessed to be in the middle of situations where birth moms choose families and the spirit confirms in so many ways how right the situation is. This past month or so has been extremely busy for me, but in a really wonderful and positive way.

It started with a sweet birth mom that I met just once in the office before she had her baby a few weeks early. I spent about three days straight in the hospital with her as she looked at families and solidified her choice to place her new little one with a loving family. I have worked with a lot of birth mothers in these past five years, but I am always amazed at the strength that they have. It never gets old. I have such respect for those who choose to offer their babies a loving, two-parent family. Reasons vary why birth moms choose to place, but I can't express what an honor it is to be a part of that process with them. This particular birth mom and two of her family members all chose the same adoptive family independently of each other while looking at profiles. They all just knew that they were the right ones. And they are. That was confirmed as the family came to the hospital and everyone met together for the first time. Such a sweet experience.There is a lot more to this story that makes it one of my most special experiences to date on the job, but that is what I can/will record here.

During the time this was all happening, another birth mother that I had been meeting with for about a month delivered her baby as well. Two at once=craziness! Luckily, the timing was perfect so that we could do her placement right after everything was settled with the first birth mother. This birth mom was younger (typically birth moms that I work with are in their 20's or older-- very few teens. Kind of weird, right? I thought when I started this job that I would be primarily working with teenagers. While I have seen quite a few teenagers during the decision making process, it has been my experience that those who end up choosing an adoption plan are out of their teen years.) Anyway, this birth mom was a teenager and she was very solid on her choice to place all along. She chose a couple online (from about 1000 profiles that are housed there). Her family was also very supportive, especially after they came from out of state to meet the adoptive family and discovered through conversation with the soon-to-be adoptive mom that she was a relative of the family on the birth grandmother's side. They were obviously from different generations and their families had lost a little bit of touch over the years, but discovering that connection was amazing for this family. It gave them such peace and showed them just how much of a hand that Heavenly Father has in this process. I mean, really, coincidence that this birth mom chose the one family online that is a distant relative to her family? I doubt it!

I still haven't caught up on all the paperwork that happens with adoptions, especially one last minute one and two at once-- but just when I was feeling a bit more on top of it, I got one of those never-had-this-before situations. When I arrived at work one morning this week, my boss pulled me right into her office and asked how busy I was. I told her that I felt a little bit more on top of things and she replied, "Good, because I have something for you to do..." Never good! :) That something turned out to be getting a couple I had never met fully approved for adoption in two days. This process normally takes months, just to give you an idea. This couple had been in our waiting pool for over 10 years (I know, can you imagine?) before deciding to withdraw their file and find happiness in being a family of two. They closed their file a few years ago and had made peace with their situation. That is until one of her best friends called her this week to let her know that her daughter had given birth and was wanting to place the baby for adoption. This couple immediately came into the friend's mind and the couple jumped at the chance to adopt this new little one. Since he was already born  and yet the couple had no approved home study, that meant I got to do one!

Just in case you wonder-- and for my memory's sake-- my two days looked like this:
Day 1:
10 am: Meet couple. Give them hoards of paperwork to complete and tell them it all needs to be done that day. :)
11 am- do first interview with couple
12 pm- do second interview with couple. Send them on their way to complete paperwork chase
1 pm-3:30 pm- write half of the home study
There went all the other things I had to accomplish for that day, but that's okay. :)
4 pm-home so that Devin could go to work. Field/place phone calls intermittently throughout the rest of the day to my boss, the caseworker for the birth mom, the couple, etc.

Day 2:
8 am: Leave house in a blizzard to get to the couple's house for interviews/home visit
9 am: Arrive at couple's house and go over all the paperwork they successfully completed in one day (medical reports, employment verifications, Bishop's reference letter, 4 other reference letters, financial forms, taxes, questionnaires (40 questions each requiring a paragraph per question), birth certificates, marriage license, etc. etc. just to give you an idea of what they had to complete in one day. They did awesome.)
9:30 am-10:15 am- finish interviewing the couple
10:15-11 am- complete the home visit portion of the interviews
11 am- follow couple to the other office (birth mom's office)
11:30 am- face-to-face with the birth mother and the adoptive couple. They are meeting for the first time. Lots of tears and so very spiritual.
12:30- drive from that office to downtown SLC to get the couple's background checks approved. This process alone normally takes about a month on average, but a nice worker at the department who completes background checks is willing to help me get them processed right then and there.
1:30- return to the birth mother's office and meet with the other worker to discuss plans. Print paperwork for the couple to sign
2:00- review placement paperwork with couple while the other worker signs documents with the birth mother
3:00- on the road back to my agency. Drop mounds of paperwork off to the secretary and dash home so that Devin can be to work by 4.
4-7- play with my kids, eat dinner, get them to bed
7-10 pm- complete the couple's written home study. 10 pages. Sign and date it and wah-lah. Done. They were approved and placed with on the SAME DAY. So unreal.

This is BY FAR the fastest I have ever approved a couple. It is funny because one of my co-workers, Lauren, just had to do the same thing about two weeks ago and we laughed about the weird things that happen and what a crazy situation that was-- and then here it is again. So bizarre. I hope to never have to do it again, though, just for the record. :) That was a lot of work, but so very worth it to see a couple who has now waited 13 years to adopt a child (and that is saying nothing of prior fertility attempts) become parents. How amazing.

I love my job. Even if it means writing a home study in a day, it is all worth it.

The end.