Adoption Update

Some people have been asking what is going on with the adoption process for us. There really isn't anything new to report, but we are ready to get going on everything again since Jace has made his arrival. We will have a home study update done hopefully sometime the end of this month and then start filing our forms! We are getting new family pictures done this week that we can then use to start a photo album for MF that we can send to the orphanage. The reason for this is so that they can start showing her our pictures and she can become as accustomed to us as possible. We have applied for every adoption grant available, though we haven't heard anything yet. But, we do have good news in that we sold our car (finally!) so the proceeds from that are in the adoption account. Yay!

The sweet woman at my work finished the translation of MF's medical records and has given them back to me. Everything there indicates that she should thrive in a family setting and her prognosis for development is good if she gets the therapy she needs- speech therapy, physical therapy, etc. She does have "minor" cerebral palsy- that's how they put it in the record. I anticipate that we will take her to the doctor here as soon as possible and just get everything checked out, including that diagnosis. One major concern is that she spent so much of her life malnourished that that is something that will need to be addressed right from the beginning, too. It was shocking to us to read that she is only 30 pounds (remember, she is 6 years old), which is 2 pounds less than what Hallie weighs. According to the report, she is only about 36 inches tall, which is also about Hallie's size.

I am re-posting a post I did shortly after Hallie was born because I think it sums up my current thoughts nicely as well. I feel the same way I did then, perhaps even more enhanced because of the additional child that I have and because we are actually in the process of adopting MF now- something I was only dreaming about then.

From December 2008, a month or so after Hallie was born:


I have kind of had a lot on my mind lately with regards to motherhood, love, adoption, and other things. While this may seem like mumbo jumbo to some, I want to share some of my thoughts. While being a mother is new to me (1 month down, a lifetime to go!), it has brought back a flood of memories for me of my time spent in Ecuador. I know anyone who has even glanced at my blog knows that I went to Ecuador because I talk about it all the time. It is such a part of me that I can't let go(nor do I want to). While working in the orphanages there, I learned to love like I have never loved before. Having Hallie only reinforced those feelings that I have felt before. The joy is overwhelming, the challenges ever present, and the love so unconditional it surpasses any other feeling.

I don't really know what I expected to feel when I had my own child, but I thought it would be something different than what I felt for the children in Ecuador. But it's not. I have really come to understand that love is not tied to blood. My feelings for Hallie are familiar to me because I have felt them before. Particularly with the baby that I grew so attached to, MF, I can honestly say I feel the same way toward her that I do toward my own biological child. While I was pregnant, I thought a lot about what would happen to MF and my feelings and care toward her. Would I just forget about her and move on since I would have a child of my own? Would my feelings lessen for her since she is not "mine"? The answer is no. If anything, I care about her more.

My heart aches to think that MF and many other children throughout the world do not have what my Hallie has. Not that I think Devin and I are amazing parents or anything, but we are parents, something MF doesn't have. I asked Devin the other day what would happen to MF and other children who were abandoned or orphaned in the eternities. I know thats a complex question, but I just wonder if they will be sealed to their biological parents or if they will be given a chance to be sealed to someone else. I know in many cases, parents abandon their children out of sheer necessity, but in the cases where they are truly abandoned in the sense that they were not wanted, I just like to think that a loving Father in Heaven will allow them to be sealed to a loving family.

I just want Hallie to grow up knowing how privledged she is and to know how much she has been blessed with. Even if we have trials and things are not always great throughout our lives (which I am sure they will not be), I want her to know that she is blessed because of the family she was born into and because of the church that she was born into. In her room, I have a picture of me and MF. I hope that as she grows up, she will ask me about her and that I can share with her my feelings toward MF and other children who are in different situations than she is.

Of course this all plays into my job in adoption. I have a greater sense of how adoptive parents can love children not biologically theirs now that I have some experience on both ends. I understand how people yearn for children to love and that the love is not conditioned on physically giving birth to the baby.

What do I want you to take from this? I don't know. Other than to know that I know how blessed I am and that I am grateful for the journey of motherhood and the feelings of love toward another human being that I have experienced in the past and am experiencing now.